Tag: cancer

Today’s kitchen experience

The box of Tetley’s Tea bags in the work kitchen has the following message on it: “A cup of Tetley’s tea has less caffeine then a cup of ground or instant coffee, and that’s a fact!”. It’s a fact apparently. It’s as if they know that people will expect companies to lie to them, so they wanted to make it clear that this is probably actually true this time. Basically, anything without a “and that’s a fact” suffix is definitely a lie. Everything else just probably is.

Also, Green Tea can help prevent cancer, but it gives me bad breath (well, worse breath). So, I’ll live forever, but I’ll be alone.

17/3/2005 Add Comment

BAM!

I’ve noticed something about mothers. They seem morbidly obsessed with sudden and sad deaths. Not a week goes by without me hearing of somebody’s mother telling stories of shockingly sudden bouts of cancer or heart attacks. They don’t seem to notice the hundreds of people around them who, every single day, don’t get cancer and don’t have heart attacks.

“Paul Brown. Sure you remember little Paulie Brown, you used to play together as kids. He’s married now; a wife to support. Three young children of his own too. Twenty six years old he is. Twenty six. Last week, he was walking across the road to the supermarket, and BAM! breathing normally. how sudden! how fine and dandy!”

9/3/2005 Add Comment